Have you ever wondered what goes on in a girl’s head?
Don’t you wonder how can girls know everything about you between 2nd and 3rd period?
Why do they go to the bathroom in groups?
What’s in the bathroom?
Well, today while I was studying at Jafet (AUB’s library), like any other day, nature called and I had to answer. I went down to the girls’ bathrooms and chose a random toilet which happened to be the one in the middle. I looked around and saw what I usually see, words written in markers, pens, pencils, some are decorated, others are not. You can find there literally every single topic that crosses your mind, actually believe it or not but every toilet has a special different theme.
Let me list first the most interactive topics and issues discussed:
1- Weight and How someone should feel about his/her body
2- Homosexuality and other sexual orientations
3- Lebanon and the Arab world, with world peace as a cherry on top
4- sex before marriage and related experiences
5- BOYS and RELATIONSHIPS You’ll be shocked if you read the things written, the experiences shared and the confessions made. And you’ll even be more shocked if you see the replies written, it can range from slut to Preach. 
But you’ll also be very surprised to read some really well-written poems and thoughts. You’ll also find names of boys and ‘feedback’ about them. Yow, Firas M., what have you done to the girls, why do they hate you so much? 
Let me make one thing clear at first, I am not invading anyone’s privacy by saying what I’m saying or bringing out what’s behind the closed door of the disgusting smelling bathroom. You can find photos all over twitter and instagram shared by AUB students making fun of what’s written on the walls. Plus, these posts are anonymous and for God’s sake if you think that sharing this here is wrong but writing it on public properties is okay and private, you have issues. Well, no doubt. 
I am not going to lie, reading such things entertained me at first, especially that my phone was draining out of battery and I couldn’t use it (BTW how did people manage to go to the bathroom before phones were invented, life was tough!), but today I felt something different. I actually thought about it, about the whole thing, what makes people write such personal and intimate things about themselves on bathroom walls, in such a very public place, asking for advice or just telling what happened between them and their partner/roommate the other night, I mean, who cares enough to feel for you and offer you a good piece of advice. 
All I see there are people trying to be funny by writing sarcastic comments, plus they work really hard to feel good about themselves by making fun of people’s emotions and bringing them down. And every time I go to the bathroom I still see new comments and new thoughts and some counter-counter replies; it’s like some girls actually come back after a while to see what people think about the things that they have shared. 
I have this urge to ask: WHY DO YOU BRING A PEN OR A PENCIL OR WHATSOEVER TO A FREAKIN’ BATHROOM?
Anyway, I read a lot of things in several toilets, some posts are funny (like checking in that table whether you peed or took a shit or both), and creative but most of them are actually.. sad. I am not in a place to judge, but this is odd, like reaaaally odd. 
What I also found out is that even boys write on bathroom walls, but topics vary a bit, although homosexuality is a common topic. So what I did is that I wandered around in Jafet asking girls what they think about this issue, like the reasons why people write such things down, what they think about these posts, what they think about the people writing things there. Then guys showed interest in the topic and shared their opinions as well. Here are some of the opinions on the matter that I would like to share with you: (with approval)
– D.H. and J.M. (F): There are some pretty cool things and some really lame stuff. But In general it’s entertaining to look at while peeing. It makes me laugh when I’m reading what people write and to think that they’re peeing while writing these things. There are some personal things that should not be on there but also other creative things. – (F): They’re honest, real and sometimes a little rude. It’s amazing what people have to say when they know there’s no one to judge them for it.
-(M): You can find all types of things there, for example, in one of the bathrooms someone wrote: ‘Please be creative’, there are also ‘عشانك يا سلوى quotes’, pick up lines, ‘size doesn’t matter’, drawings of organs & naked women, Illuminati, Jokes, criticism. But basically “maskhara”. Maybe those people have no one to talk to. – Ali: I see gay confessions, no offense. They are not forced or anything, they choose to write such things to feel relieved or better. “Byiktbo men albon”. You can also find phone numbers of guys and girls, I tried calling one of the numbers once to warn them but unfortunately no one picked up. But why write on bathroom walls? I see more politics on these walls than outside on the streets and among people. It’s stupid. If you you are lonely and can’t talk to anyone, get a dog. It’ll be loyal. What help would writing problems all over walls get you? –
– Luay Gharzedine: graffiti on girls bathroom walls are a way for such girls to self validate through putting down other girls. it speaks nothing of the girl’s they hate on, but rather are a projection of their own insecurities that they attempt to validate by making themselves feel superior to someone else. girls fight a social game from an evolutionary perspective, rather than the physical ones guys have been forced into because of our stronger physique(guys hit each other while girls will spread rumors). theres type of personalities regarding how they treat others in view of themselves. a “6/10” will be needy and beg for attention. theyre just generally bitchy and annoying. a “7/10” will be combative, and lower others peoples status in order to establish their own. this is the group many girls fall into when they write things on bathroom walls. an “8/10” will be competitive, and will seek to beat other people at the value/status game by establishing that theyre the best. this is usually the result of a “7/10” being surrounded with many other “7/10″s and wanting to beat them all. its a natural progression. its better but not by much. a “9/10” or “10/10” will raise their value by raising everyone elses, establishing their role in the group as an alpha male/female. everyone else will look to them for validation in return, and generally nice people go into this category.
– A psychology major student (F): It’s interesting and mean. There are confessions, then there are some people circling them and commenting ‘Slut’. They need to talk to someone, they obviously have no one to talk to and they find that writing it on paper is not enough. So they go on telling the world what’s going on cause they are anonymous, no one will know, no one will judge them personally.
– Sahar: I believe that most of the things written are lies, they seek attention like ‘Hey look I did this and this’. Someone even wrote that she has slept with a professor. Check the bathrooms at FISK “3andon eshya 7elwe” (she laughs). Who the hell asks for lesbian advice on a wall? It’s pointless, yet hilarious. But really, WHY? – Sandra: I think it’s really disgusting when I think about because they are writing while doing whatever they’re doing in the bathroom, transferring all these germs when lending their pen to someone or just using it, it’s disgusting.
– (F): It is unacceptable, but it’s entertaining at the same time, ma ba3ref, they need to clean that bathroom
– Mariam: Some are interesting, some are sort of disturbing, I think it’s nice to have people take out the opportunity to express themselves free of judgement.
– (F): It reflects the student body, but these people are sharing things that they can’t say out loud which is good. They are afraid to say some things, and they need to hear advice without anyone knowing it’s them because they are afraid of judgement and mean treatment. They also want to find people who share the same issues to feel better about themselves. But it’s sad. I think that the best thing to do is seeing a psychiatrist or something like that.
– (F): It’s funny and entertaining but who has the time? But who’s bothered, I don’t get who is actually bothered to sit and write there. Maybe they can’t find another way to express themselves cause it’s anonymous, no one will know it’s them.
– Katy: A girl said she is pregnant, and another girl in west wrote about sleeping with her professor. They make me sick. No positives out of it, it’s a waste of time. It depends some girls go for it for comfort to find more people like them but you don’t have to look at someone else’s opinion to feel good about yourself. – Ayat: Helween w mahdumeen, they entertain you. They say what they can’t say outside, I think that we should actually show what’s written down there. It’s sad though, people are so desperate to talk that they write it there, they don’t have someone to talk to. 99.99% of the stuff is sexual. – Rosanna: It’s interesting and keeps me entertained. Girls have a lot of things to say, I think they need counseling, there are a lot of homosexuality related stuff and things that no one can say out loud, it’s kind of their diary, they write things down knowing that no one will know it’s them and get advice without it affecting their reputation which seems to be a big deal in Lebanon.
Well, everyone agrees on one thing, those people need help. Our society ,and especially our generation, is mean. People are judged and tortured for what they believe in, for what they like, for who they are, for what interests do they have, for all different reasons that make a person who he/she is. But writing your problems on bathroom walls won’t get you any actual help, all what you’ll find is people who are trying hard to feel better about themselves by laughing at your problems or calling you a bitch, or leaving some sarcastic or mean comments.
I see some nice things, I am not going to lie, some people actually care enough to write you something that would help you in a way, but mostly you’ll find hate. You’ll feel worse about yourself, because you are letting people define you, you are giving them the power to judge you, to be mean, to think for you.
Don’t let anyone think for you.
You are special
You are pretty
You are beautiful
You are strong
You are amazing
You are worth it
You are not the number on the scale
You read this in the bathroom and you should know it’s true God damn it you are more than what you have in your purse, you are more than the grades, you are more than somebody’s boyfriend/girlfriend. You are human, and you are worthy of living, I mean look, you exist.
You are bigger than the problems you have at home, you are more than your sexual orientations, and your problems don’t deserve to be posted on bathroom walls and doors for people to laugh at Seeing a specialist is not wrong, talking to someone about it is not weakness, don’t be afraid and don’t harm yourself.
Next time you go to the bathroom wipe what you’ve written then go home have a hot bath and a cup of lavender tea and think. Think about a plan to get over all the difficulties and start over, there is always hope for everyone. Always. 
Not this Barbie..
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